Dan And Rainy Rock

I want to bring Dan and Rainy's memorial to this site to share with Rain and John's memorial, all family not by blood but by sheer love. I didn't know Dan but I did know Rainy and it seems to me that these two were born to live, love, and be together. **This information comes from another site not written by myself but actually by Dan a few days before his death and it's beautiful so I won't change it at all** Once said at the Dan's Funeral... they were born on the same day as Rainy drew her first breath Dan's mother went into labor...


Dan Rock is the person that wrote this memorial, it was the last thing he ever did.

It was an amazing rainy day when I met you and it was sad rainy day when you were taken from me. You were my childhood friend, my first love, my first kiss, my life’s ambition, and now you are the most wrenching pain I will ever know. You taught me so much more than you probably know you did. I stare into your mirror and can still feel you sitting behind me with your arms and legs wrapped around me forcing me to face my pain as the tears fell and told me over and over how beautiful I was. I would give anything to hold you in front of this mirror of memories and tell you how beautiful you were and how I loved you more than life itself and how much you helped me. My god how could you take her from me after all we’ve been threw? I never believed in God until I meet her and now she’s gone because of a freak accident. If you are reading this now and haven’t been blessed by knowing Rainy Smith read on so that you can fully appreciate what a beautiful woman she was.

This memorial is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, sadly Dan Rock passed away this morning 10/15/06 at 7:08 from a suicidal overdose of his medication. I just can't believe that all of this happened, not only did we lose my beloved daughter but now we've lost the one thing that kept her voice alive. Dan beleived that Rainy could save the world with her voice but some how those words didn't save Dan for such a tortured soul. Battered and brusied I know that she's waiting at those gates of heaven waiting for him but she didn't have to wait to long. Dan and Rainy my babies in heaven, I love you my baby doll and Dan you were the son I never had, my you both rest in piece.



I met you just by chance in 3rd grade, by 6th grade we started dating, then our freshman year you were my first kiss. I was so nervous I almost missed but you reached out and cupped my face in your hands and kissed my forehead and then on the lips under the bleachers at a football game. I was so privileged to take you to prom after your Dad gave me the speech and regained my breath from seeing you in that beautiful black dress with your grandmother’s pearl necklace on. Then you went to college and our lives began to drift apart but you were never far my heart and every girl I dated just wasn’t you. Then I heard you got married and I just knew that I’d lost you forever but I was so very wrong. That was just the beginning.


You were so beautifully flawed, that’s what you called it. You spent your whole life fighting a disease and feeling so alone. Depression was your beautiful flaw. I remember seeing you just fall apart so many times for no reason and there was nothing I could do but hold you and always ended up crying with you. I’ll never forget seeing you on my doorstep all cut up and thinking there had been some accident only to want to die for you when I found out there was no accident and that you had done it to yourself. Years later you told me that it was your way of crying when all the tears were gone and how the physical pain was so much easier to deal with than the emotional.



My how the years did things for you, like fine wine you just got better with time. Eventually your depression became your voice. After all the doctors and drug treatment you quit taking it all and found your own cure. When you realized that your depression wasn’t a curse but a blessing you bloomed into an even more beautiful person. When your battle was ending mine was just beginning when I was diagnosed with depression. I knew before they told me what I had and I just didn’t want to fight it. But after years of not talking you must have known and sent me an email just to see how I was. When I told you about all my pain you cried for and with me. Your marriage was crumbling in your hands but you held your head high and reached out to me for support. You lived so far away but we talked everyday and you taught me so much about depression in those phone calls, I think you might have saved my life.


Your marriage was ending and you flew home for a week to make arrangements. It was the first time I had seen you in over five years, I couldn’t wait. You had sent me a list of 20 things you wanted to do with me that made me all warm and fuzzy inside and one of the things was to go to the beach and watch the sun set with me. And of course we were going to make that happen, I picked you up from the airport and picked you up swung you around like a rag doll and kissed you repeatedly. You blushed and then cried when you got into a truck filled with roses and a special CD of music you loved including this song played on the radio. I headed directly to the beach and we laid in the back of my truck watching the sun set and then talked under the stars until you fell asleep in my arms. At that moment I knew as I always had, you were the only person for me and I wanted to spend the rest of my life loving you. I watched you sleep until the sun rose and you opened your eyes and kissed me.



We spent a week together and I tried so desperately to get her to move in with me, but of course she knew that wasn’t a good idea at the time. She moved in to an apartment down the road and immediately threw herself into your dream job. She did lectures on depression to colleges, high schools, and pretty much any one that would listen. She could motivate even the most darkened souls, I’d give anything to see her up on a stage pouring her soul out to enlighten people to the real dangers of depression and the real way out of it’s grasp. I went to every seminar I could and eventually wasn’t shocked when she was offered appearances on talk shows and even her own show on the local PBS station. She never got to do any of those things.


The night you were taken away from me, it rained and I learned that no good deed goes unpunished. Earlier that day I had asked your Dad for your hand in marriage and he was elated as I busted out the sparkly diamond ring I had just purchase three days earlier. I called you on your cell phone because you were late, you told me that that you wouldn’t be able to make it because you had just witness a car wreck and couldn’t really talk because you were talking to an officer. Before you hung up the phone you told me you were sorry and the last words you ever said were, “I wished I was in your arms right now, I love you baby, see you tomorrow.” I was worried and stayed up waiting for you to call me back to tell me what happened, but the next call I got was from the hospital. They just said there had been an accident and I needed to go to the hospital. I called your parents up as I darted threw the rain to get to you.



When I got there you were in surgery. The officer that you had talked to sat in the hall way covered in bandages and it was clear he was burned pretty badly. He asked me to come into a private room to tell me what had happened. He told me what you had told him about seeing a drunk driver weave all over the highway, almost causing a 18 wheeler to jack knife but eventually he flew off the highway flipping several times and landing in a ditch. Rainy dialed 911 on her cell as he stopped and rushed to aid the driver. The officer showed up shortly after and helped extract the driver that was so drunk he kept asking why there was an angel there (referring to Rainy.) They aided the driver as they waited for the EMTs to show up and she took the call from me. Shortly after the EMT arrived the officer and Rainy stepped back and stood only feet from the flipped car and talked about what had happen. The officer said he blacked out at that point but by standers said the car just burst into flames causing Rainy and the officer to fly always 15 feet away. Rainy landed with a huge shard of metal in her chest and a 12 inch piece of glass having gone almost completely threw her neck. The life flight took her to the hospital where she was immediately sent into emergency surgery.


My love was laid to rest today, October 14,2006. She never made it threw surgery. She left this world doing what only she could do, saving someone’s life. The driver of the car survived and has to live with the fact he took such a beautiful light from this world. It’s true people don’t just die because they hit people, but they can actually kill the people trying to help them. But I know Rainy wouldn’t have it any other way, she’d help anyone who needed it even if she knew it meant ending her own.

Always missed and carried to her final resting place by the hordes of people that loved her.
We all died when she left this world.

**So ends Dan's memorial to Rainy**
I remember you Rainy, I laughed when I met you thinking you had to be joking about your name... how often are you introduced to a Rainy by a girl named Rain... not often. I knew your husband that you divorced, he was a horrible man... cold, heartless, and devoid of any emotion while you over flowed with emotion. Last time we spoke was a cold day early October '06 you were just moving back home an into a new place. You were insanely talented with changing the way thing seemed to be... what we saw as a busted old coffee table you took in like a child and we sat drinking cider on the patio as you painted it, I see it so clearly in my head black legs and a white top with those little mirror circles bought at Hobby Lobby tons of them made into what looked like stars all over the top. You gushed over Dan and how ironic after everything you two hand "crashed" into one another like stars. By the end of the month you were both amoungst the stars, I remember thinking that all of this was some Shakespearen tradegy.

Rain wrote a song for your service after talking with Dan, turning his words into her music... I wished I could hear her sing it again it was beautiful from Dan to Rainy. Rain was supposed to sing it at Dan's Funeral but she couldn't make the first few lines come from her broken hearted lips but the melody played on the piano... I don't know why we don't have a copy or video of her preforming it either time, I carry the tune in my heart... maybe someday I'll preform it and catch all of the love Dan had for Rainy in Rain's words with my voice.

This is Rain's song
Always a First

The way you laughed at my silly rambling
Reminds me how little you’ve changed
You told me a little know fact about yourself
How did you know
How that would rip my heart out
A wound that I can’t believe we now share
It’s my depth, my silent scar

You’ll always be A first and always last
But right now I can only listen
With my hands tangled in my hair
Hating what I can’t change

This scar has left me so alone in this world
The one thing that can drop me to my knees
Something I wouldn’t wish on worst enemy
And to know that someone else
That didn’t deserve such a fate
Is now on their knees sharing it’s brunt

You’ve always been A first and always last
But right now I can only listen
With my hands tangled in my hair
Hating what I can’t change

Makes my breath stop
Cold blood in my veins
Makes me scream
As I beat the broken glass
That cuts deep
The one thing that I thought I knew
Was that I was completely alone
In these blood soaked satin sheets
And now that’s completely shattered

I’ve always wanted you to be
A first and always last
But right now I can only listen
With my hands tangled in my hair
Hating what I can’t change

The anger that held me together
As I fought a daily battle
Within my own world
Seems to just fall to the floor
As I stand in front of this unforgiving mirror
But your still making me laugh

Because regardless you’ll always be
A first and always last
But right now I can only listen
With my hands tangled in my hair
Hating what I can’t change

**The way we all could say good bye to both of you, we did at your funerals, it was strange surely I'll never see it again but it was actually Rainy's own idea**

Instead of dropping flowers or tossing dirt on to the casket which is traditional we bought tons and tons of those little circle mirrors from Hobby Lobby and mixed them with glittery confetti... instead of tossing it down on to the casket we threw it up in the air and let it fall down... Raining down your own glittery beautiful life, lighting up that dark whole like you lit up our lives everyday we knew you... Our Glitter goddess proceeded by her Romeo... they are buried side by side and though not married in life their head stone says Rainy and Dan Rock, Rainy was thrilled that someday her name would be Rainy Rock a beautiful name on their birthday we take glitter confetti and little mirrors out.